I married the love of my life 7 years and 3 kids ago. A lot happens in 7 years. Our original wedding vows have been buried under thousands of diapers, arguments about socks, sick kids, Netflix binging, joyous times, painful times, and all the stuff in between.
I still love our wedding vows. They’re the same vows I have led many couples through as a presiding pastor. You know the ones:
I, Ryan, take you Amy, to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.
These vows are good because they are umbrella vows. Most couples don’t quite know what they’re getting into, and these vows cover the gamut. However, after 7 years, I thought my vows needed a refresh to account for specifics in our marriage. Specifics like: Amy’s brain cyst and chronic pain, odd spending habits, conflict, house duties, romance, and mind reading. So here they are.
7 Year Vows
I vow to always keep and love you, Amy Joy, as my wife, no matter what.
No matter how tough it gets, I will be here.
No matter how much pain your brain cyst causes you, I will be here.
No matter how much I have to cook, clean, and keep the kids out of our room so that you can have a moment of respite, I will be here.
I vow to love you when you feel unlovable. I vow to make you happy when you are sad (even if my jokes are bad). I vow to give you back rubs whenever you ask me.
I vow to guard my mouth from saying foolish things, and I vow to apologize quickly when the foolish things come out.
I vow to pause Star Trek, put down my book, or turn off my phone when you need help.
I vow to try my best at mind reading so I can do things you are thinking about. (I’m serious about this one, but I may need a little grace… a lot of grace.)
I vow to always serve you and love you in happiness and in grumpiness.
When you ask me if something makes you look fat… I vow to give you a love tap and remind you that you’re beautiful. (Yes, I’m avoiding the question.)
I vow to never complain about your shopping habits… more than once per shopping excursion.
I vow to get your late night treats, whatever they may be.
I vow to listen and not treat every argument like a logical debate.
I vow to always be a man you can depend on, trust, and follow toward Jesus.
I vow to re-up my vows as often as needed because I love you. Your heart and grace teach me so much about God, and your constant drive to serve is humbling.
I will probably say 10,000 more dumb things in our life together, but there’s no one else I would rather be with. I know you love me no matter what. I know you will always serve our family with strength and grace.
My prayer and final vow is that Ephesians 5:25 would move increasingly from my head to my heart so that our marriage will reflect the love of Jesus to those around us.
Lord, help me be a husband who loves his wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.